Your whole dating experience could fall apart if you take the “wrong” car along. Chemistry, click, love, lust and all are undoubtedly important in a new relationship hitting the road for the first time, but bad “carma” could turn you into a unsteady crash test dummy without a steady. Here, then, is a list of automobiles to avoid if you wish to make a good impression on that first or blind date.
ELECTRIC CITY CAR
These things have a limited range, especially if you activate the air-con and are in a bit of a rush, so you might run out of juice at an inconvenient juncture, like halfway to her house after dinner.
RALLY CAR
More practical than an F1 car and much easier to park, but the bucket seats with their racing harnesses are uncomfortable, there is no air-conditioning and the only in-car entertainment is the engine.
CHINESE JALOPY
This tacky upgrade from a rickshaw sets off a cacophony of “cheap date” alarm bells, even if you’re ready to swipe your Bank of China credit card. Admittedly, Apple iPods are also made in China, but at least they are well-designed.
CONTINENTAL CLASSIC
Stylish and full of character, but also susceptible to overheating and the occasional complete mechanical breakdown in the middle of downtown traffic. Ugly rust might get onto her pretty dress too, worsening matters.
PRACTICAL MPV
One guy, one gal and seven seats just don’t add up, so leave the people-mover at home where it belongs. If you drive an MPV on a date, you might as well also bring daddy, mummy, the maid and a few random kids.
MONSTROUS SUV
Manhandling a Hummer or a similar 4×4 monster on an otherwise low-carbon-footprint date is like firing a Gatling gun in a friendly game of paintball. She doesn’t have to be an eco-warrior to be turned off by this.
BENGMOBILE
Silly spoilers galore, a ghastly bodykit, various neon lights, a loud paint job and an even louder exhaust are the stuff of nightmares for any female executive who made the mistake of giving that eager boyracer a chance.
GLORIFIED GO-KART
Motoring mayhem, Caterham-style, makes for an incredible drive and a terrible date. Every woman will be driven up the wall by this crazy car, which lacks doors, windows, windscreen, roof and amenities.
SONATA TAXI WANNABE
If she needs a Hyundai cab, she would much rather flag one down than date an aspiring Hyundai cabbie. If you really have a taxi fantasy, you could always play it out in a Mercedes-Benz E-Class or a Chrysler 300C.
NO-CASKET HEARSE
You work in a funeral parlour and have the keys to the funereal company car, which is classy black and dignified. No, you shouldn’t use it after hours, even if your date is the morbid type who wears death wish nail polish.